This here fly landed in my coffee cup the other day. And then I drank it. It was thick and fuzzy in my mouth, and I got a pretty good understanding of the nature of true fly substance before I spit it out.

Probably the grossest thing I’ve done in a while, but hardly a ripple when it comes to my latest challenge. It’s a challenge that seemingly felt pretty cool at first, but as I’m finding, it’s not always a walk in the maternal mommy park.

Today I’m learning how to be a mother to ONLY two…two quieter, easier wonderful teens, that is. My oldest. My coolest. Wait, did I just type that?!

Yeah.

I’m learning how to go to Target without ANYONE asking me a million questions. Like, all I had to do was push the cart through open space, without navigating around little feet in my way.

I felt free to go shoe shopping!!

Underwear shopping!!

The teens were with me the whole time, and I didn’t hear even one peep from them.

I felt so free without the younger set, that I actually did something I haven’t done in a while – got myself and the teens mocha frappuccinos from Starbucks.

It’s a lot cheaper to buy three drinks, as opposed to five after all.

The younger set is staying with their grandmother at her beach house until Sunday. I’ve already caught myself having thoughts of possible day trips with the older set, or to just hang out with them at the bookstore in the little set’s absence.

You know…do things we might not normally do.

It’s hard to plan things when your entourage is so huge…or when they ask so many questions.

But for now, while they’re gone, I’ve been able to do laundry, make dinner, work from home, etc.

I feel like the sky is the limit.

But I’ve also come to realize another thing, too. All this change is ok and everything.

But, really?

I’m TOO free.

There isn’t enough multi-tasking going on in my head right now.

Life’s too easy.

There’s no drama.

No conflict.

And I miss them.

How I’m going to make it to Sunday is beyond me.

I hope it goes by fast.

Being free is definitely not all it’s cracked up to be sometimes.

It’s probably how that fly felt just before he landed in my cup of coffee. He was probably so freaking happy to have found such an amazing delicious liquid to partake of, and then he drowned in all its glorious freedom.

Ok, maybe that’s not exactly how I’m feeling, but it might be just a tad.